John Lloyd Quotations

Maybe the universe is a giant practical joke and we don't know the punchline.

I can't see Tim Henman as the sort of player who hangs around the tennis circuit ranked 30 or 40 in the world,

I can help you shape your sitcom, I can help you think about what could make your sketch show better, but it won't help you get you a commission.

Jokes are a lot about meaning. I think if we understand what jokes mean and why they work, we'd understand everything else. Genuinely I do.

I think the thing about Ronnie Barker is this, ... He proved that, if you do what you like, as long as you do it well - and he did it better than anyone - you can take everybody with you.

It all depends if you can get your point across, and if thinks he can make a difference, but it's good because it will be informal.It will also help people recognise him because I didn't know who he was before today.

I think he's almost looking forward to the end of the year because he's had a pretty awful year but a lot of it's been due to injuries - I don't think he's ever felt he's had a full chance this year,

You can analyse a joke and say it's funny because this guy thought this was going to happen, and that happened, and it's surprising. But not all surprising things are funny.

I still don't like authority exercised without reason. But they laugh at you at Cambridge if you say that sort of thing. For them, the law is a system of rules not that different from mathematics.

I spoke Spanish when I was three, and then Maltese. I love dictionaries. I like foreigners. My dad moved every year before I was 14, and I learnt to like abroad. I'm not scared of change.

We are very, very pleased with progress so far.

The universe is fractal. The closer you look at it, the more interesting it becomes.

I have very strong views on TV. There's no diversity, there's no choice. Things are decided by committee.

It's very frustrating to pay in order to stand still.

I probably did pack a lifetime's work into the 1980s.

You can't predict anything. How can you be certain about anything when everything is chaos and we're not in control?

It's not possible to say where the explosives came from,

I couldn't tell you, to be honest, ... Even though I'm playing it, it's still not my main sport.

I'd never bought the idea that you don't lose money by underestimating the intelligence of the audience. Although perhaps I should add that I've never really made that much money.

I do have at home the most ridiculous number of awards for what I have done, which is nice in terms of being patted on the back, yet it does cure you of caring about what other people say about you. Ultimately, you must have your own standard of what is good enough.