Gary Chapman Thinking Quotations

I think that in today's world, by nature, we are all self-centered. And that often leads to selfishness.

I think people desperately want to feel love.

They start at the very beginning. The whole account of Adam and Eve is a very romantic picture. I'm also thinking about Samson. That's a really unique picture. He went down to this land and saw this lady and got what I call 'the tingles.' In that culture the parents worked out the details. I think that the phenomenon in that initial attraction is seen throughout human history.

Respect begins with this attitude: "I acknowledge that you are a creature of extreme worth. God has endowed you with certain abilities and emotions. Therefore I respect you as a person. I will not desecrate your worth by making critical remarks about your intellect, your judgment or your logic. I will seek to understand you and grant you the freedom to think differently from the way I think and to experience emotions that I may not experience." Respect means that you give the other person the freedom to be an individual.

I think the tingles are important. They are real, and I am in favor of their survival. But they are not the basis for a satisfactory marriage. I am not suggesting that on should marry without the tingles. Those warm, excited feelings, the chill bumps, that sense of acceptance, the excitement of the touch that make up the tingles serve as the cherry on top of the sundae. But you cannot have a sundae with only the cherry.