Aspirin Quotations

Pop music is aspirin and the blues are vitamins.

I don't take any of the medications I took when I was younger: antibiotics, antacids, aspirin, asthma inhalers, ulcer medication, allergy shots.

Professionalism in medicine has given us medial miracles for the affluent but hospitals that will charge $35 for aspirin.

A couple drinks. A couple aspirin. Repeat.

When a regular person gets sick, they take an aspirin. When a writer gets sick, they take notes....

Aspirin will not bring dead hookers back to life.

The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.

After quitting radio I was able to live on the money I saved on aspirins.

The pressure gets worse the older you get. The hole starts to look the size of a Bayer aspirin.

Cinema never saved anyone's life, it is not a medicine that will save anyone's life. It is only an aspirin.

Oh! kangaroos, sequins, chocolate sodas! / You really are beautiful! Pearls, / harmonicas, jujubes, aspirins!

Movie failures are like the common cold. You can stay in bed and take aspirin for six days and recover. Or you can walk around and ignore it for six days and recover.

Golf tips are like aspirin. One may do you good, but if you swallow the whole bottle you will be lucky to survive.

I take New Years with a grain of salt and three aspirins.

You know, back in my days, they used Bayer aspirin for contraception. The gals put it between their knees, and it wasn't that costly.

Friends seem to be like aspirin; we don't really know why they make a sick person feel better, but they do.

I don't even take aspirin.

My head is pounding. I wish the mints were aspirin.

I realize now that taking drugs was like taking an aspirin without having a headache.

When there’s an ache, you want to be like aspirin, not vitamins. Aspirin solves a very particular problem someone has, whereas vitamins are a general ‘nice to have’ market.

What I found does the most good is just to get into a taxi and go to Tiffany's. It calms me down right away, the quietness and the proud look of it;nothing very bad could happen to you there.

Rusty thinks I should smoke marijuana, and I did for a while, but it only makes me giggle.

We are not bearing our crosses every time we have a headache; an aspirin tablet will take care of that. What is meant is the trouble we would not have if we were not Christians.

In 1844, Karl Marx said, "Religion is the opiate of the masses." He said this at a time when opium and opium derivatives were the only painkillers. And he said it helped a little. He might as well have said, "Religion is the aspirin of the people."

Most things in this world don´t work, aspirin do.

Clowns work as well as aspirin, but twice as fast.

A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.

Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.

THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.