Ambrose Gwinett Bierce And Quotations

Revolution is an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.

RHADOMANCER, n. One who uses a divining-rod in prospecting for precious metals in the pocket of a fool.

REVELATION, n. A famous book in which St. John the Divine concealed all that he knew. The revealing is done by the commentators, who know nothing.

KISS, n. A word invented by the poets as a rhyme for ""bliss."" It is supposed to signify, in a general way, some kind of rite or ceremony appertaining to a good understanding; but the manner of its performance is unknown to this lexicographer.

BONDSMAN, n. A fool who, having property of his own, undertakes to become responsible for that entrusted to another to a third. Philippe of Orleans wishing to appoint one of his favorites, a dissolute nobleman, to a high office, asked him what security he would be able to give. ""I need no bondsmen,"" he replied, ""for I can give you my word of honor."" ""And pray what may be the value of that?"" inquired the amused Regent. ""Monsieur, it is worth its weight in gold.

A coward is one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.

RASCAL, n. A fool considered under another aspect.

OFFENSIVE, adj. Generating disagreeable emotions or sensations, as the advance of an army against its enemy."Were the enemy's tactics offensive?" the king asked. "I should say so!" replied the unsuccessful general. "The blackguard wouldn't come out of his works!

ERUDITION, n. Dust shaken out of a book into an empty skull.So wide his erudition's mighty span, He knew Creation's origin and plan And only came by accident to grief -- He thought, poor man, 'twas right to be a thief. --Romach Pute

Age. That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no longer the vigor to commit.