Clive James Classic Quotations

A sceptic finds Dallas absurd. A cynic thinks the public doesn't

The entrée wasn't tender enough to be a paving stone and the gravy couldn't have been primordial soup because morphogenesis was already taking place.

One of the virtues of the NHS... it doesn't worry you about money at the moment when you're least capable of doing anything about it.

She wasn't just beautiful. She was like the sun coming up: coming up giggling. She was giggling as if she had just remembered something funny.

Beyoncé and pathos are strangers. Amy Winehouse and pathos are flatmates, and you should see the kitchen.

Delivering the State of the Union? That bloke couldn't deliver pizza.

An education without a Bible education is no education.