Daniel Handler You Quotations

I will love you as the iceberg loves the ship, and the passengers love the lifeboat and the lifeboat loves the teeth of the sperm whale, and the sperm whale loves the flavor of naval uniforms.

Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.

No matter who you are, no matter where you live, and no matter how many people are chasing you, what you don't read is often as important as what you do read.

I will love you as misfortune loves orphans, as fire loves innocence, and as justice loves to sit and watch while everything goes wrong.

I stayed there loving you, though the love made me, not sad but I guess melancholy, for a reason I couldn’t point to.

I know you can't see it, not you, Ed, but maybe if I tell you the whole plot you'll understand it this once, because even now I want you to see it. I don't love you anymore, of course I don't, but there's still something I can show you. You know I want to be a director, but you never truly see the movies in my head and that, Ed, is why we broke up.

But just suddenly I really, really needed to see you again right that minute, that night.

In love, as in life, one misheard word can be tremendously important. If you tell someone you love them, for instance, you must be absolutely certain that they have replied "I love you back" and not "I love your back" before you continue the conversation.

You would run much slower if you were dragging something behind you, like a knapsack or a sheriff.

I want to love you and take you pretty places. Yes, I have things wrong, but also I can walk through walls if you'll let me show you.

I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday.

I never want to be away from you again, except at work, in the restroom or when one of us is at a movie the other does not want to see.

It is often difficult to admit that someone you love is not perfect, or to consider aspects of a person that are less than admirable.

For Beatrice--My love for you shall live forever. You, however, did not.