Dave Barry Balls Quotations

For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.

In the Bowling Alley of Tomorrow, there will even be machines that wear rental shoes and throw the ball for you. Your sole function will be to drink beer.

Crabgrass can grow on bowling balls in airless rooms, and there is no known way to kill it that does not involve nuclear weapons.

You can, legally, possibly hit and kill a fellow golfer with a ball, and there will not be a lot of trouble because the other golfers will refuse to stop and be witnesses because they will want to keep playing.

This ball was so crowded that it took me - a trained professional journalist with vast experience in this area - forty five minutes to get a beer.