Eoin Colfer Two Quotations

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom.

If you're going to read five books, three should be issues and two for fun.

Look at those two. Wasting time. You wouldn't catch me doing that.

I hear that you were on a date with Trouble Kelp. Are you two planning on building a bivouac any time soon?

I can't imagine what they're planning. But I can tell you two things. We won't like it, and it won't be legal.

Excuse me, Captain. Are you two going to weep salty tears of admiration over a helmet all night, or do we have matters to discuss?

I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?

The two of them went down in a heap, with not even a turkey to break their fall.

Why no aggressive action?" Foaly squirmed in a harness built for two-legged creatures. "Oh yes, why no aggressive action? How I long for aggressive action." "I live for aggressive action!" thundered Orion squeakily which was unusual. "Oh, how I pray that dragon will turn 'round that I may smite it." "Smite it with what?" wandered Foaly "Your secret birthmark?" "Don't you mock my birthmark, which I may or may not have.