Henny Youngman Marriage Quotations

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

We were married for better or worse. I couldn't have done better, and she couldn't have done worse.

My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.