Joey Adams Quotations

Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.

A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.

The difference between playing the stock market and the horses is that one of the horses must win.

Rockefeller once explained the secret of success. 'Get up early, work late - and strike oil.'

Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you.

If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all.

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

People are still willing to do an honest day's work. The trouble is they want a week's pay for it.

Rockefeller once explained the secret of success. 'Get up early, work late -- and strike oil.'

We've made pretty good progress. We're the type of offense where when we need to score in crucial situations, we're going to put points on the board.

Cut out those intimate little dinners for two - unless there's someone with you

We've heard they've had signs up about Cuero for the last three weeks, ... We're excited about playing this game but not to the point where we do not know what we're doing. We just have to go into the game with intensity and remain focused on our goal.

We've heard they've had signs up about Cuero for the last three weeks. We're excited about playing this game but not to the point where we do not know what we're doing. We just have to go into the game with intensity and remain focused on our goal.

A bikini is like a barbed-wire fence. It protects the property without obstructing the view.

Smack your child every day. If you don't know why - he does.