Mae West Humorous Quotations

Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home, I'm tired.

It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.

I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.

I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.

I saw what a mess a lot of people could make of their lives when they're smitten. Some of them go temporarily insane. They find a person who they think holds the key to their happiness-the only key to their happiness... My work has always been my greatest happiness

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

If a little is great, and a lot is better, then way too much is just about right!

You are never too old to become younger!

Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present

It's all right for a perfect stranger to kiss your hand as long as he's perfect.

I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.

I've been things and seen places.

I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.

No one can have everything, so you have to try for what you want most.

I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back of your dress?