Will Rogers Years Quotations

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.

Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.

The fellow that can only see a week ahead is always the popular fellow, for he is looking with the crowd. But the one that can see years ahead, he has a telescope but he can't make anybody believe that he has it.

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.

On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.

I was born on Nov. 4, which is election day ... my birthday has made more men and sent more back to honest work than any other days in the year.

Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than the government we got for one-third the money twenty years ago.

You could transfer Congress over to run Standard Oil or General Motors, and they would have both things bankrupt in two years.

You can't legitimately kick on income tax, for it's on what you have made. You have already made it. But, look at land, farms, homes, stores, vacant lots. You pay year after year on them whether you make it or not.

A woman can make a man feel older or younger than his years if she so chooses. Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men. Women were made with a sense of humor so they could love men instead of laughing at them.

My own mother died when I was 10 years old. My folks have told me that what little humor I have comes from her. I can't remember her humor, but I can remember her love and understanding of me.

On prohibiting anybody from learning anything: Why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.

The Republicans have a habit of having three bad years and one good one, and the good one always happens to be election years.

Get a sales tax, small on necessities and large on luxuries; then a stiff inheritance tax on the fellow that saves and don't spend. That will get him either way. A tax paid on the day you buy is not as tough as asking you for it the next year when you are broke.

The old horse is coming back in a high lope. Thousands of people are riding a horse today that five years ago couldn't sit in a Ford with all the doors locked.

Cattlemen have lost more in the last few years than anybody and say less about it.

I do honestly believe the Republicans have reformed and want to do better. But whether they have done it in time to win the election is another thing. The old voter is getting so he wants to be saved before October every election year.

They are voting whether to keep a governor two years or four. I think a good, honest governor should get four years, and the others life.

It will take America fifteen years of steady taking care of our own business and letting everybody else's alone, to get us back to where everybody speaks to us again.

We fed 'em Xmas and New Years; now all the poor have to do is just fill the few meals until next Xmas

Funny thing about being a U.S. senator, the only thing the law says you have to be is 30 years old. Not another single requirement. They just figure that a man that old got nobody to blame but himself if he gets caught in there.

Wine had such ill effects on Noah's health that it was all he could do to live 950 years. Show me a total abstainer that ever lived that long.

Politicians, after all, are not over a year behind public opinion.

If we could just go back the last two or three years and do our buying a little more carefully, why... we would be O.K.

Wish all the Farmers would move to town one year, that's the only way I know to clear the thing up.

Millions and millions of people don't pay an income tax, because they don't earn enough to pay on one, but you pay a land tax whether it ever did or ever will earn you a penny. You should pay on things that you buy outside of bare necessities. I think this sales tax is the best tax we have had in years.

Here is my Farm Relief bill: Every time a Southerner plants nothing on his farm but cotton year after year, and the Northerner nothing but wheat or corn, why, take a hammer and hit him twice right between the eyes. You may dent your hammer, but it will do more real good than all the bills you can pass in a year.

Why don't somebody print the truth about our present economic situation? We spent six years of wild buying on credit - everything under the sun, whether we needed it or not - and now we are having to pay for 'em, and we are howling like a pet coon.