Phyllis Diller Law Quotations

My sister-in-law is so skinny that she has a striped dress with only one stripe.

My mother-in-law buys her coats in a carper shop. She wears a 9x12.

My mother-in-law must be the probation officer I got for the crime I committed of marrying my husband.

I'd love to slit my mother-in-law's corsets and watch her spread to death.

Mothers-in-law do not make good house pets. Once I had the most wonderful dream -- I dreamed that mothers-in-law cost money and I couldn't afford one.