John Barrymore Funny Quotations

Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?

My wife was too beautiful for words, but not for arguments.

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two weeks.

I am thinking of taking a fifth wife. Why not? Solomon had a thousand wives and he is a synonym for wisdom.

You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.

Busy yourselves with this, you damned walruses, while the rest of use proceed with the libretto.